


𝕺𝖓𝖊 𝕷𝖆𝖘𝖙 𝕳𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖙𝖇𝖊𝖆𝖙

by laohenxx



Category: XiaoDery - Fandom
Genre: Fluff(?), M/M, Star-crossed, Xiaodery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 07:55:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25347319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laohenxx/pseuds/laohenxx
Summary: This is a story about a boy who have found light at his darkest day. Who have found his one true and only love...But he did not have any idea that he would have to love and be there for him...Stand by him...Until his very last heartbeat.
Relationships: XiaoDery - Relationship, Xiaojun/Hendery
Kudos: 8





	𝕺𝖓𝖊 𝕷𝖆𝖘𝖙 𝕳𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖙𝖇𝖊𝖆𝖙

**Author's Note:**

> An AU inspired by Stand By Me of WayV and Katy Perry’s The One That Got Away.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy reading ❤️

**[Xiaojun]**

There was a comfortable silence between the both of us after hours of laughter and numerous exchange of loving and longing words for one another the whole night even though we have seen each other earlier.

I heard him let out a soft and loving sigh on the other line and I just smiled as I imagine his face which is just curling up into a huge smile. Thinking about it just makes my heart flutter and all I can do is sigh softly at the phone. 

“So.... got any plans tomorrow??” He started again with his deep but loving voice.

My lips then turned upside down after hearing that question. My heart drop while thinking of what excuse I should say this time but my mouth betrayed me this day as I said the words,

“I’ll go to the hospital tomorrow....” I heard him gasped as his phone dropped on the floor which made me sat up straight on my bed not knowing what was happening to him on the other line.

He lets out a nervous laugh which made me calm down but at the same time my heart was pounding so hard. I had to press my hand on my chest and slowly breathe in and out to calm myself down. 

I heard him let out a shaky breath while placing the phone near him again. “Y-Y-You’re kidding right??.... u-uhm.... is your parents sick or.... s-something?? Oh come on! Uncle should really just rest——!”

“No....... “ He stopped which made me continue, “I’m the one who’s going.”

Silence once again. Pure silence was enveloping the whole place even when his place were kilometers away from ours which was making me feel so uneasy.

“Y-You....? Why...? Y-Y-You-” His voice turned soft and I could feel that he suddenly choked in his words which made me feel a large needle that was piercing through my heart.

I need to think of something else.... fast. 

“Guanheng..... Everybody always goes in the hospital for a check-up—-“

“You seemed.... p-pretty weak these days.....” I bit my bottom lip hard when I heard him talk as if he had just realized something..... or things...

“No...! When did I even loo—-“

“Y-You.... Weren’t acting so... e-energetic like before....” I can feel my eyes welling up with tears as I just gripped tightly on my phone.  
  


“Noo~! I was just tir—-“

“...... and I heard you... q-quit p-playing at... t-the field....” Shit.... he knows....

“I was.... just foc-cusing on my... s-singing—-“

“Bullshit.” He said with a very low and cold tone which made my heart sank and it made me close my eyes only to feel the hot and salty tears slowly come down my cheek. 

“E-Excuse me—-?”

“I said that’s bullshit Xiao Dejun!!” I immediately covered my mouth with my hand as I let out a soft sob when he repeated what he just said. “Just tell me the truth!! You know—- You know how I fucking feel—-! About hospitals!!!” He’s now letting out louder sobs in between the words that was escaping his own mouth which just made my heart shatter into very small pieces.

“G-Gaunheng....” I couldn’t help but sob outloud while slowly placing the phone down on the mattress as I began feeling my heart pounding painfully fast which made me wanna cover my mouth so my parents would not hear me at all as I began to sob loudly. With every sob, I could feel my heart as if it’s being pierced continuously by a needle. My heart was just pounding so hard that it began hurting all over my own body. 

“S-Shit—-“ I whispered softly as the pain increases with every breath that I take.

“Jun.....”

“Jun!!”

“Xiao Dejun!!!”

I couldn’t control it anymore and just slammed my body on the mattress. I slowly couldn’t feel the muscles in my body it was as if it turned into stone as loud sobs continued to escape my mouth. I wanted to clench on my chest to make it all stop but I just can’t move at all even my jaw just continued to drop as my sobs got louder and louder. 

I could hear someone screaming at the other line but I just couldn’t make up the words that it was saying. I couldn’t control my body as I tried to at least curl up. I did not even notice that my brother has entered when I felt him carrying me almost immediately as he entered. 

“It....... okay..... jun..... okay....” that was all that I can hear as I slowly feel my eyes closing and my sobs are becoming softer and softer. 

“I-I-I’m sorry.....” That was I can only say as I feel my eyelid slowly dropping then I finally passed out.

......

I groan when I felt the familiar feeling of these needles on my hands and especially on my chest. There was also a ventilator on me again which made my eyes widen in shock. Panic starts to arise when I hear a heart monitor running slowly but then somehow quicken because of how panicked I must seem.

I’m here..... again. I thought before feeling a gentle squeeze from such a soft hand that was holding mine tightly. It was as if he does not want to let go of me and it just made me felt so calm as I glanced at who it was this whole time.

I do not know if I should feel sad or happy that he’s here.... 

But now, I am really happy to know that he is here with me so suddenly which made me squeeze on his hand and that made him sit up straight and slowly blinks his tired eyes.

So damn adorable.... I thought. I frown the longer I stare at him because you can visibly see the lack of sleep in his eyes. When saw me staring at him, his eyes widen as if he felt so happy that I was awake and it just made me smile even more. He then leans in on the wall to my right side continuously pressing a button probably wanting to call the attention of the nurses and the doctors. 

He gripped my hand once again and smiled weakly at me as I slowly see his eyes slowly wells up with tears which made my heart break into a million pieces.

“Y-You’re awake.....”

——————

**[Hendery]**

“Daddy!! Daddy!! Where’s mommy??” A seven year old Guanheng asked his father who just continued on drinking his alcoholic drink while staring blankly on the wall. 

The young Guanheng just pouts as he just tries everything to get his own dad’s attention by walking towards his side of the couch and is now climbing on it. “Daddyy!!!” The adorable kid whines at his dad as he began hugging the older man tightly while slightly shaking his big body. Although, what his dad did next shocked him so bad when he went flying off from the man then down the cold wooden floor.

“DON’T YOU DARE TOUCH ME! YOU DISGUST ME SO MUCH!! YOUR “MOMMY”’S AT THE HOSPITAL! YOU KNOW WHY?!?! IT’S BECAUSE OF YOU!” His own dad screams in anger with the smell of alcohol lingering from his mouth. 

Little Guanheng could not process what his father had just said since of course— he was just a kid. All he could do was cry while thinking that his dad hated him so much. It really pained him seeing his father like this but he just couldn’t understand it at all. 

It all happened so fast for him to even cope up with everything. One day, they were just running in the hospital in the middle of the night when they got the news, that his mom had just died with a severe case of aneurysm. All that he can do was cry when he saw his dad kneeling while crying at the doctor begging him to revive his own wife. The nurses then looked at him with pity on their eyes but all they can do was watch as the two cries out in pain since... it was just too much to even bear. 

He loved his mom, she was everything to him. She was like his own big world which gave him the courage to dream big and be a star. Years have passed, he threw it all away.... but not until he met him, Xiao Dejun which is now the love of his life. 

He couldn’t just think of how he will be without him, he just couldn’t think of anything else... other than him. 

And now.... a pattern is slowly beginning to form again and he hates it. He felt like the world is now cursing him for some reason. Maybe, he dis something really bad in his past life which made him have this kind of luck in life. 

But he has to be strong.... at least for his only love.

————-

“Y-You’re awake.....” I softly said to him while holding on to his soft but pale hand while looking at me weakly as he continues to breathe on ventilator which just makes me want to cry once again. Before I know it, tears began to well up on my eyes. 

He just smiles but before he can even say anything, the doctor has finally arrived along with the nurses and with Dejun’s parents. I clenched my fists while looking at then as they check his vital signs and replaced all the equipment around him. 

How can he even smile like that to me when he just experienced so much pain from yesterday?? 

I snapped out of my thoughts when I felt a pat on my shoulder, it’s Dejun’s mom.

“You really love my son don’t you...?” My heart swells while hearing her motherly voice but all I could do was nod.

“Y-Y-Yes ma’am....” My voice cracked after saying that which made her hold both of my hands which made me face her.

“I really love my son. He’s very strong hearted. He’s got big dreams that it just hurts me to see him like this.... I feel like I have done something wrong not only as a mother of this precious child but as a person. I really hate seeing my son suffering like this.... but I am just glad that he met someone like you dear. Which was a pity because you have only seen him in this state today.....” she said with so much pain in her voice that I just couldn’t take it anymore I wanted to ask and just burst out.

“If that’s.... if that’s the case.... then why—- why not conduct the transplant?? I mean I have heard that they’ve already g——-“

“He doesn’t want to. He never wanted to use our money for something that risky. That’s why.... my son.... is a very brave man in my eyes. He’s brave because.....

He’s now ready to face his own faith.”

—————-

It has been weeks after all of it has happened and now we are just days away from graduating. I never missed a day in visiting him in any time that I can and some people from his extracurricular activities have come to cheer him on all the way. They always come with me after class especially when they heard that Dejun was hospitalized. Xiaojun really felt so damn happy that his friends made some time to visit him which made me so happy too. 

I was feeling so happy—- really happy when I finally got a letter from our dream school—- Shanghai Theatre Academy. We have talked about this even at the day that we had first just met. It was his dream to be a performer and he always tells me how every time he’s on stage he feels as if he’s in cloud nine and like everything was possible....

So one day..... I did something that I thought was impossible after the doctor allowed him to go outside his room. I gather our classmates into helping me build a small stage for him at the rooftop of the hospital. Then there, I brought him up while he was sitting on a wheelchair and a blindfold on him. 

All of our classmates, some of the nurses, his doctor and his family was there as our audience. After taking off the blindfold, I got on my knee and bring out a small box and opened it only to see two rings inside. I can see his eyes well up with tears but I just smiled while looking at him with a tear already falling out from my eye. 

“I-I know..... I know that fate is not on our side right now.... But I wanna take what I can get.... I wanna love you.... I want to love all of you Xiao Dejun. This love story of ours may mot end well.... but I promise you... I promise you that you’re the only one that will always be inside my heart. Always, I will love you unconditionally; Always, I will love you endlessly; Always, I’ll stand by you just like how you did when I was the one experiencing all those troubles in life.....

So.... Xiao Dejun.... Will you marry me???”

His tears were already like a damn waterfall when I finished everything that I have wanted to say to him, what my heart wants to say to him. 

“Y-Yes Guanheng....” He sobbed and the crowd went wild as I quickly wear the ring on him and he did the same to me as we hugged tightly. He then pulled away to wipe all of my tears but all I could think of was leaning in and giving him the sweetest kiss.

“I love you.... Huang Guanheng.”

“I love you too.... Xiao Dejun.”

After that day, a week passed by and it was already our graduation day. 

We were all throwing our caps happily and all I could think of was visiting him today again in the Hospital and finally spend the whole day with him. So I quickly bid my friends goodbye and finally went the fastest way towards the Hospital to see him. 

I happily knock on the door before opening it only to see my lovely wife resting on the bed. I carefully placed the flowers and the vegetables on the table before sitting down beside his sleeping body. 

My smile grew even wider when I finally saw him slowly open his eyes. 

“Nowww I present, the future artist and gem of Shanghai Theatre Academy, Xiao Dejun!!” I said in a deep and funny voice which made him giggle softly in return especially when I even placed him my cap before kissing his soft lips.

“Stop acting so silly and come cuddle with me.” He said to me in which I did not hesitate even for a second to do so. I placed an arm under his head before facing him and wrapping my other arm around his small waist. He then faced me with the biggest smile on his face. 

“I am so proud of you....” He said while wrapping his arm around my waist as well.

I just sigh while caressing his cheek gently. “I wish... You could just stay....” I said which made his face drop. 

“I.... can’t take it anymore Guanheng, I’m tired...” He weakly said as his eyes became glossy and it made me lean in to peck his forehead. 

“I know, don’t worry.... I’ll just be here, always.” I said as I see him smile at me while slowly closing his eyes. My hand placed on his chest as his hand was just clenching on to mine. 

“I.... I love you....” I said while pulling him close to me, hugging him like my life depended on it.

And before I knew it..... He’s finally gone.

My one true love, Xiao Dejun... is gone.

—————

𝕰𝖕𝖎𝖑𝖔𝖌𝖚𝖊

2 years ago....

September 11, 2017

‘It is the first day of classes and I’m at my 11th year here. Now I don’t know what to do after finishing High School but I bet looking for part-time jobs won’t be a bad idea since I have to move out of the orphanage once I turn 20....

I didn’t know that my life after my mom died would feel like a total hell....’

I finished writing just in time for our homeroom teacher to arrive along with a small, timid-looking guy that is just avoiding anyone’s gaze but all of the girls were now mumbling and whispering to one another. Since I must admit the guy looks really handsome indeed. 

The teacher slams her hand three times on the podium to grab all of our attention which startled the student next to her and it made me scoff. This kid is probably homeschooled, I thought to myself.

“Listen up class! Today is our first day and today we have this lovely student right here. He’s from Dongguan and now, he transferred here in our school! So please be nice to him okay?? And treat him well!” Our teacher said while the chatter of the students became louder and louder.

He smiled at everyone as his eyes quickly scans everyone before speaking which was kind of odd—- but understandable. “Hello everyone, my name is Xiao Dejun. Please take good care of me! And I hope we can all be good friends even if there are now only two years left... but I still hope that I can create wonderful memories with you all.” He said with the smile on his face which made all of our girl classmates sigh happily, as expected since he also looks so gentle in front of them. 

I huff as I looked out from the window in which I can clearly see the football field where there are some seniors playing already. I just placed my palm on my chin as I huff once again not bothering to listen to everything the teacher was saying at this point. I have been in this facility for a long time now but I never really gain any friends, only acquaintances.

It’s not that I don’t like them. 

It’s just that... I know they will be gone one day anyway so what’s the point??? 

“Guanheng....”

“Guanheng....”

“Mr. Huang!” I flinched when I heard the slam that was made again by our adviser and it made me face her but this time the new kid was not next to her.

“Good, I finally got your attention. Now please stop daydreaming because I have chosen you to be Mr. Xiao’s buddy for this semester. Since I figured that one always needs a friend in class, right?” She said and I just huffs while slowly glanced at the person next to me.

So this is where he went.

Our adviser then smiled and continued with her introduction.

“Uhm.... hey....” I heard a soft voice say as he moves his head as if trying to see my name tag. “Your name is....?”

“...... Guanheng.” I simply said while looking back at the field not even focusing on the lecture or to anyone anymore. I don’t get why he asked me that question when the teacher already mentioned it...

“Oh cool!! Nice to meet you!! I hope we can be good friend—-“

“Whatever.” I said which made him quiet down which made me just scoff.

After that day, he felt like a damn magnet that was always behind me 24 freaking seven. My day always consists of him blabbering things like:

“Good morning Guanheng! How was your day?”

“Hey, did you copy the notes on page.....?”

“Hey, can I join you here and eat??”

“Hey, do you know where the bathroom on this floor??”

“How about here??”

“Hey! Did you have lunch already???”

“Guanheng have you done any of your homework last night?”

And it goes on... It just won’t stop—-

“Guanheng have you——“

I slammed my hand hard on the table which attracted most of our classmates. 

Of course it did. 

“Can you stop it?? It’s getting really annoying. Have you even listened to yourself?? You’re like a freaking parrot always talking and talking and talking.... Do you even have better things to do huh? Go to someone else. Don’t bother me anymore... _Please_ god damn it.” I said it all at once and after I was done talking, I could feel the atmosphere quickly became colder but then I was stunned when he just smiled at me and nod as he took a sit next to me like nothing happened.

Which made them all stop and just be stunned at what just happened.

Including me.

Days have passed since that incident occurred and it has never been more peaceful around here. I have never felt so happy again that no one bothers to even bother me at this point. Although, I hate this feeling that I get whenever I feel him sit beside me.

It felt like.... I’m waiting for something.

Still waiting for it.... but it never came.

So I just brushed it off. Who freaking cares.

Days turned to weeks and it’s still bugging me so much that it is now making me boil in so much anger and confusion. I get mad when he does not greet me, I get super pissed off when I see him talk to other people except me, I got mad at myself when I almost waved at him when he was feeling so lost at the cafeteria.

What the hell is this??

Am I..... _**missing**_ him???

I angrily packed my things when our teacher was finally done with the lecture which made me stamp me feet so hard as I fast walked towards the music room. I slam it down behind me and finally walking towards the drums set, well, my drum set which I’m glad that they have allowed me to keep it here.

I grabbed my drumsticks and sat on the chair facing the set. I clapped the sticks together three times before finally hitting all the parts.

Tong tse ta tsee tong tong ta tsee....

Tong tse ta tsee tong tong ta tsee....

_Tong tse ta tsee tong tong ta tsee...._

With each rhythm being repeated, my hand movements became faster and harder that I did not even noticed that I was gripping so hard on my drumstick.

_Tong tse ta tsee tong tong ta tsee...._

**Tong tse ta tsee tong tong ta tsee!**

**Tong tse ta tsee tong tong ta tsee!**

I kept on hitting and banging until I can feel my hands get really tired which made me let go of my sticks and sigh as I lay my head on it.

Why am I feeling so angry about something that small....?

“I didn’t know that you can play drums....” I flinched when I suddenly heard his voice but I did not move one bit for a while and act like he was not there. I felt myself sat up straight when I heard someone sat down somewhere but my eyebrows furrowed when I saw him facing the piano.

“I didn’t know that you can play the piano....” I softly said as I hear him punch in some hard notes which slowly sends chills down my spine but all I did was stare at his back.

_“The hurried yesterday.... has left_

_The slow today..... is here_

_With life’s daily necessities accompanied by the years_

_Time is.... everything_

_I miss all the memories_

_Missing yesterday’s happiness_

_Why is time..... Everything?”_

He lowered his head and sighs while I slowly feel my heart turned heavy with every word that has left his lips. I bit my bottom lip when I see him turning around with a smile which made me stare at him feeling a bit confused.

“Oh right—— okay sorry I just really needed to let something out of—-“

“Did you composed that song??” I asked as I see him smile and nod slowly.

“I made it while I was 15....” He scratched the back of his neck and just turns back again on the piano probably feeling shy once again which unknowingly made me smile as I face him. 

“It sounded.... great.” I simply said while picking up my drum sticks again and just began playing with it. Neither of us spoke for some time but it felt like we both want to talk about something but neither of us really don’t know where to start.

“Hey....”

“Hey....”

We both chuckle when we suddenly spoke at the same time. We waited for one to speak about but when I decided to speak...

“About what happened weeks ago....”

“Your drumming skills are nice....”

I was surprised to hear that from him that it almost felt like my heart jumped out of my chest. It felt so foreign to feel like this which makes me so confused for a moment but I decided to brush it off with an awkward nod. I have never acted like this whenever someone compliments my own skills especially my drumming skills.

But why is it that just a simple word from him.....?

“Hey.... about what happened weeks ago.....”

“Can we be friends??” He quickly said which I really find it to be so cute but I just shrug.

“Sure why not??”

I blinked since I didn’t know why I have quickly said yes to someone like him.... 

After that day, it felt like my whole world turned upside down. It felt like as if I have been living someone else’s life because after that day... I have found a friend.

A friend that was there for me and a friend that I can also support with everything.

A friend that has discovered my passion for music and a friend that I can support with all his dreams and wanted activities in this school.

He wanted to be the greatest performer that he can be.... while also pushing me to be better for him and our future...

And here I am slowly building it for the two of us.

“Hey man, what are you working on??” I smiled while glancing at my best friend, Yukhei.

“Just... finishing our song.” I softly said while nodding immediately understanding what I meant by “our”. I was unbothered when I felt him sat on the chair across from me.

“Do you.... ever miss him—“

“Every single day... Every hour.... and every second I miss him....” I pursed my lips while glancing up at him. “There was never a day that I don’t... but...” I shake my head while chuckling softly. “Whenever I write songs and even play the piano... I can feel him.. I can feel him here, with me, just standing by and cheering me on...” I said as I see him just staring at me with an understanding smile. He gently pat my shoulder while glancing at the lyrics that I’m writing. 

“You have been writing that song... ever since I met you in the music room... almost 4 years ago and now here we are... singing and making music together in the same group.” I smiled when he still remembered the most little detail. Yes, I have been writing our song for a total of 5 years now ever since Dejun and I decided to create music. 

“Well.... I want it to be perfect.” I said while glancing down at my note pad while being deep in thought.

“You know... I feel like he will be happy to hear it whatever the result of this song maybe... but...” He quickly glanced at the clock. 3:15 am. “You have to rest Hen, we still have tons of things lined up for tomorrow. You know how Kun ge is whenever it’s morning.” We laughed while nodding. Yes Kun ge can get really grumpy at the morning but we all understand why. Taking care of all five of us was never an easy job.

“Okay... okay... I will...” I said while nodding and jus pats his back when he finally stood up to go to his room.

“Okay.... time to finish this...” I said while looking at the lyrics again and clicking the play button on the audio.

“Stand, stand by me 

Stand by me, will you just stand? 

Stand, stand by me 

Stand by me, will you just stand?”

———————-

“Guanheng!! Guanheng!!” I smiled happily while looking at my boyfriend who seems to be strangely happy today...

“What? What is it , my love??” I asked while pulling him close to me the moment he finally sat on the chair next to me.

He pursed his lips while his cheeks slowly turned into a light shade of pink. He cleared his throat while looking down on his lap before finally speaking. “On our graduation! Let’s sing a song together!” He happily said while passing me a piece paper.

I tilt my head feeling confused and just wondering what is on this paper. I glanced back at his smiling face feeling really excited on what is written on the paper. 

“Just open it!!” He eagerly said while letting out a softly giggle, like always.

I opened it and a smile immediately curl up to be face while looking at the title of the unfinished song.

“Stand By Me.....”

———-

Today is the first time that we are going to sing our song on stage today and everyone was all laughing and joking around in the dressing room. While me, I could not help but feel nervous as hell while our make up artist puts on the last touches of my make up.

“Hey....” I just hummed when I felt Kun ge’s warm touch on my shoulder. “We will do fine today okay?? You have made such an amazing song for all of us and I know that our fans would love it as much as we do. So just breathe okay?? We’ll be doing just fine... you’ll be doing just fine...” he said while I finally looked at him and all of them who are now staring at me with a proud smile.

“Yes!! That is true!! Your song is really amazing Hendery!!” Yang said while giving a thumbs up while the others began to cheer on.

“Okay okay okay come here guys! 5 minutes before it’s showtime!! Let’s go! Let’s go!” We all stood up and made a circle and to my surprise they all stood around me leaving me on the center and giving me the warmest group hug. 

“For Dejun!! Weishen V Let’s go!!” They all cheered which made my eyes widen in surprise before feeling their tight hugs.

**_Xiao Dejun,_ **

_You are my love and you were my only love. I have never experienced this kind of love from anyone ever since the day that I have met you. You were the biggest piece that made me whole again, you were the biggest piece in my heart that made me, me._

_No... a better version of me even and I have never been so glad, so happy and so.... fixed and so motivated to reach this far in my life. I thought that... my life would just end that year before I met you or even after I got mad at you._

_And when I lost you for real this time.... I thought that it was the end... but it opened so much doors for me that it just felt so overwhelming..._

_Maybe this was your way of thanking me, for always being there for you, for loving you until the very end of your journey._

_I’m glad that you loved me and maybe you still are, wherever you might be._

_I would never stop loving you even until my very last heartbeat...._

_I would always stand by you...._

_Like how you were always stood by me, my love._

_I love you, Xiao Dejun_  
  


_And I will always do_

**_Until my last heartbeat._ **

_𝕱𝖎𝖓_

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> It’s my first time writing a fanfic of mine here and this was a bit of a rush sorry hahaha.
> 
> But I would appreciate it if you guys leave a comment 🥺 thank you!!


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